everyday's a new chapter...

So there is nothing harder then being at work when you don't want to be. Especially when your sister-in-law and her husband are in from London and you can't have off because you're the only person that works in your office OTHER THAN your boss who hasn't really been coming in that much.

Ugh, it's not even 8:30am yet....I see a long day ahead of me.

So I went to my doctor and my Triglycerides are 1974 with meds. That's bad. They are supposed to be about 150. So, since we have all the nice new money for the year for our health care spending account, I went to see a nutritionist. She has me walking 30 minutes everyday and a can have 3 meals a day at 45 carbs per meal and two snacks per day that are 15 carbs. Little or no sugar. I also have to keep a food journal. Sigh. Just what I need is more work. But it's like she said "We need to get this under control right now. Not saying I can't have sugar ever again but this is bad."

Plus they changed my meds around. Kevin and I are cleaning out the cabinets. There still are some Fruti Pebbles in the house that must be removed asap. I can tell these first few weeks are going to be hard. AND reading food breakdowns in a busy, Sunday afternoon grocery store is hard. I have to look for Carbs per serving and then remember to see how many servings there are and then, if the food has more then 5 g of fiber I can remove the fiber points from the carbs.

I think we are really going to start eating a lot of beans. Lots of fiber and low carbs. She gave me a sheet and a book and I'm carrying them around with me.

Right now all I can think about is I want a cookie. Something sweet. I'm going to run to the store and get a diet dr pepper and some snack popcorn for later.

Slow afternoons and nighttime are going to be the hardest.

I'm sitting here at work and I refuse to work for the rest of the day. After dealing with my boss, a copier/printer/fax sales man and my bosses 13 year old daughter for the better part of 2/5 hours - I've decided that's enough.

Her daughter is completely spoiled. I lit a candle earlier because there was a man that came in to change something on his policy and he made the whole office smell like an ash tray for hours. I leave the office for my lunch and come back and the little pryo has poured wax into a cup at the other desk and generally been screwing with the candle.

This is the second time her kids have gone all "burn" happy on me. Last time it was during the summer and they were setting things like paper on fire and pouring wax on each others hands. We still have wax on our bathroom walls. I was on the phone during a lot of it. When I let her know what was happening, she told me I really needed to be better at watching them. They were kids after all. (13 and 11)!!!!!

So the rest of the afternoon is mine. I don't care.

So Wednesday I found out that a friend of mine died suddenly. She was a woman I worked with and she helped me out a lot when I first started my job. (The training materials around here are horrible.) She was 70 years old but was fine a month and a half ago.

She made a really big difference in my life. Not just learning my job but making some bad days better. I basically talked to her everyday for a while for support and with questions. She said she liked me and that out of all the people that have had this position, I was the brightest bulb so far.

We talked about our lives, our bosses, our families and our pasts. I had no idea she was 70. She was so full of life and I had so much fun laughing on the phone with her.

She worked for her boss for 16 years. That's half of my lifetime to this point.

The day she died I was going to the hospital that night to visit her. I never got a chance to tell her that she really made a difference in my life and I would never forget her.

It's amazing the impact people can have on one another - sometimes even without knowing it.

The very first job I ever had was at a 'Venture' store. (Think K-mart meets Target) Anyway the store was just opening and there was a bunch of us there helping to build and stock shelves and add signs and hang clothes. Most of us were partnered up with people and I was partnered with this woman that was like 7 or 8 months pregnant. For some reason the bosses seemed to think even with her large belly, swollen feet and tiredness she should be able to climb ladders and do heavy lifting. I didn't feel it was right so I did a lot of the bigger parts of the job and had her fold the clothes and do the smaller non-baby stressing chores. I was 17 at the time and in pretty good shape so it wasn't that big of a deal to me.

Of course I eventually quit that job and moved on to a 'wonderful' new position at a kiosk in the mall selling crystals and shiny things. And about a year and a half later, at Christmas time, I ran into her and her husband and their little baby. They had named her after me. Little Kristin. Same spelling and everything. She told me that my kindness in helping her while she had that job really touched her and that she liked my name and hoped that her daughter would grow up to be as kind of a person as I was. I had no idea that she had felt that way.

Sally was my friend and now she is gone. Her family lost an amazing woman right around Christmas and so did the rest of us. I'm going to miss her.

http://www.livescience.com/animals/071218-monkey-call.html

This articles first line is:

Female monkeys may shout during sex to help their male partners climax, research now reveals.
Without these yells, male Barbary macaques (Macaca sylvanus) almost never ejaculated, scientists found.

Or another subject could be
-Even Monkey Females fake it
Or - why I wear certin things for my husband
Or - No shit!!!

Top most hated Christmas songs:

Dolly (freaking) Parton's 'Hard Candy Christmas'

Garth Brooks 'The Gift'...every time I hear that first line, A poor orphan girl named Maria...I can't turn the radio off fast enough.

To be continued....

Edit: Madonna's 'Santa Baby' makes me want to hurl.

So I hurt the crap out of my back on Friday. The doctors felt so bad they gave me a shot in my back and a nice script for Valium and Hydrocodone. So needless to say this weekend FLEW by.

However my boss, whom is kind a of spoiled bitch, has required me to be at work today. Her daughter is sick so she can't be here. Oh and pills and all I still freaking hurt.

...I forgot the point of this. Oh wait. I have the Christmas music station on and it's kinda nice.

I just heard the song, "I wish I had a river." by Joni Mitchell. I think that is one of my favorite winter songs.

I remember decorating with my mom the house each year. Climbing up on the roof with my dad to do the lights. Some of the best moments and memories that I will carry with me forever. Back when you're a kid and the most important thing you have to worry about is what gifts you might get.

Yesterday was a banner day for me at my doctors office. Not only did I have my yearly Gyno appointment, (stirrups and all) but they gave me a flu shot. It has now left this wonderful red ring on my arm. My whole arm area around the shot is warm like my body is fighting an infection and I feel horrible. I'm achy and tired and I feel so...blah. I hope this is worth it.

So this little puppy loves to chew cords. She has chewed through the modem power cord, cutting off the internet. She has chewed her way through 2 pairs of Iphone headphones and the current pair he has bite marks in the ear-buds. She has chewed through my phone charger cord.

And now she's really out done herself. She found a toy of mine. A very special toy that's powered by batteries and has a long cord on it that goes from a speed controller..... okay lets just say personal massager. Anyway, the little bitch chewed right through the cord. Tore it completely apart! I found it dissected into to two this morning. I almost wanted to cry.

So to celebrate our birthdays, my friends Jodi, Melissa and myself all went to Vegas. Can you guess which of the following happened to which one of us:

A. One of us got super sick and barely left the room.
B. One of us slept in bed with a naked girl.
C. One of us gave our number to a complete stranger and then promptly passed out on the bathroom floor.

PS: And all of us vomited. Not all for the same reasons though.

Izze lost a tooth yesterday. FREAKED ME OUT. She was chewing on something and I pulled it out of her mouth. I was looking at it and it was hollow on the back side. It wasn't plastic but it look like she had taken a bite of it because it had teeth marks.....oh wait.

I had my very first kiss on my 6th birthday. Jeremy Shoemaker. At Chucky Cheese in Irving in the strobe light booth under the main stage. It was quick and sweet and I will remember it forever. He gave me a "Gold and Glitter" barbie doll, even though I was a total tom boy and he knew it. "My mom made me get you a barbie instead of a GI Joe." He knew me so well. I think he set the tone for all the other men in my life. At 6 he knew that I wanted a GI Joe. That I was different. That I was special. I didn't gross out like other girls. Even at 6 I knew I loved that about him.
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At the ripe old age of 31 I think I want to take a minute and take stock of somethings.

I'm married. I never thought I would get married. But then again, I never thought I'd meet someone like Kevin. It hasn't been the easiest year for us, but now I realize that we are even closer for having gone through it together.

I have a great and diverse group of friends that I enjoy and that round out my life.

At 31 I seem to have found my creative side again by starting three major film projects for myself.

I'm working on setting goals for this next year and working towards them. Getting in shape, working out, eating better, moving to a bigger place, finding more of a balance between work/home.

I'm torn because I do want to have kids but in order to have them I have lose a lot of weight, get into better shape and commit. Their will be fertility issues and it could take time. I don't know if I'm ready for the commitment yet. But with my PCOS, I have to face the fact I have a smaller window of opportunity to get pregnant. It's going to be interesting to see how this plays out.

I remember as a kid I really wanted my birthdays to be cool. I wanted to feel like a princess. Now, I want the people I care about to give me a hug and tell me that their glad I'm here. It was never really about the toys, it was about being loved for who I am and being reminded that my coming into this world wasn't such a bad thing after all.

Never ___________________________ when you don't have clothes on:

-Super glue anything
-Piss the cat off or pick them up
-Sit on vinyl or anywhere with out looking first

I mostly learned the super glue thing this week. Pass it on.

So does anyone have any useful input on what to do when an old credit card company you didn't pay and they charged off like 6 1/2 years ago decides to sue you? What's the best coarse of action if you ever plan on trying to buy a house in the future? Should I get a lawyer for a balance of just 856.00? Is it best to go to court, even if it's by myself? Should I just ignore it and wait for it to go away? How do you read this stupid thing to tell when you are supposed to go to court?

Help.

(I don't really have the extra funds due to husbands 3 month medical leave this year, so any suggestions are welcome here.)

Kevin and I just celebrated our first anniversary. We have not yet given each other our gifts yet because it's supposed to be paper so we both are writing something to each other.

Re-cap: 2005
Kevin and I met on line on eHarmony in May of 2005. I liked him from the moment I saw him and I believe I chatted him first. We talked on line for awhile and then finally set a date for our first date. However, his mother had a heart attack in KS and he ended up driving 14 hours back to see her in the hospital that weekend.
While he was there, I texted him a lot to say hi and let him know he had a friendly face back here in Texas thinking about him. And one night I got a little forward with the texting and kinda freaked him out...(dirty txt messages were meant to make him laugh and distract him from his family woes--AND I had never done anything of the sort before in my life..)
The weekend after he arrived back in town we went out on our first date. He was broke and so I offered to pay for dinner, (Hyde Park Grill Mac n Cheese baby). We came back to my apartment and watched Shawn of the Dead and then went and got coffee at Starbucks. We then came back to my place again and I mauled him. I loaned him my copies of BSG, which he still has never watched, and he left.
The next night he called me and said he couldn't do this, (relationship thing) and that he might have an STD and it was all too much for him.
....blink....blink.....ok
Then he proceeded to close me out on eHarmony. (Ouch)
So I, being the honest person that I am took him for his word and proceeded to send him an email saying that I was really sorry he was having a hard time but if he needed a friend to talk to, I would be there and not to think that no one would want to date him even if it did turn out he had an STD.
No response.
A week or two later I went to this cool Draft House thing where I met Bruce Campbell, I texted him to tell him about it since it had come up on our date....
No response.
I needed my copies of BSG back to give to a friend in Dallas to watch and he brought them by and ended up staying for like an hour or two just talking. He left saying it was nice to have met me. And that was that.
So, I gave up.
I erased his email, phone number. I was done. I kept chatting up guys online and went home one weekend in July 2005 to spend time with my dad. He was home alone because my mom was up in PA with my dying grandmother, so I went to hang out with him.
On the way home on Sunday I get a 512 area code call I don't recognize but I answer it in case it's an emergency. It was Kevin. He just called to tell me how sorry he was it didn't work out. THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE AN STD. And one thing lead to another and we were on the phone for hours. Finally I was back in Austin and he invited me to dinner and thus our second date and kissing session.
So we tried dating again. And the 3rd date was Shady Grove and Porter Davis and a wonderful date that I will remember for the rest of my life. It was amazingly good.
And then two weeks later he broke up with me AGAIN. He made me cry, said he wasn't attracted to me and said we should still be friends. I didn't think he would ever call me again. I did not call him, he called me and before the end of October we were totally dating. Well, once he thought I was dating other people, then he decided that he and I were dating and should only be dating each other.
By the end of December we decided we should live together.
In there somewhere was a lot of talking and hanging out and me sleeping on the couch because he didn't want anything to happen in the bedroom yet. I still remember the first time I ever saw his butt. It was so cute and white and anglo-saxon.
In all fairness I did come on strong. And I told him from the beginning I'm not going to be the one in the relationship to say now to driving to Mexico spur of the moment. I'll be the one that says, "Hell yeah, we could have Margarita's on the beach with breakfast in the morning."

So my boss totally got a letter from a customer today saying that I gave amazing customer service and that she is overly happy with our agency and a customer for life. Wow. Wow. I mean, when I worked at bigger companies I've had that happen before, but it's just her and I in the office, so it really is just awesome.

(insert bad-ass dance right here.)

I noticed a long time ago that my life was proportionally crazy to the number of keys I have on my key ring. More keys equaled more responsibility which equaled more work, etc. So I decided right then and there to keep it as simple as possible. Heck, at one point I had it down to 3 keys on a plain ring. One for my car, one for my apartment and one for the mail box. (Ah the simpler times.)

Now I have three perks cards and a little mermaid charm, a library card and 8 keys.

Eight!!

None of which open a medicine cabinet with Xanax in it which is what I really need.

We've been getting a lot of faxes today. The fax machine is located about 5 feet from my head so I know this fact for sure.

But I swear to God that for the last 4 faxes, it sounds like it's saying "Brad Pitt, Brad Pitt, Brad Pitt" everytime it spits out a page....

I'm not even a huge Pitt fan, but maybe the universe is trying to tell me something.......like get the damn fax machine away from your head.

So, I heard that like 1 in 4 or 1 in 5 people last year didn't even read a book. Not one book.

So far this year I have read two books in a series. Sloppy Firsts and Second Helpings. It's this story of this overly smart, sarcastic girls' years in high school and collage. It takes me back to those wonderful days of craziness and caddy,backstabbing witches. And those talking to someone for hours and discovering you're not alone in the world.

It's a fun break from 30 year old woman town where I normally live. Where I clean up poo and puke and pee from the animals and dishes from the husband and go to work and trudge back home...

So today after dropping off the husband at work at 9 AM, I saw the damnedest thing. There was a lady, maybe in her 40's or 50's, walking her dog, while in her car. Yes, car. She was driving her car in the parking lot while her dog was walking outside the car. She was holding the leash out the window. Yeah, lets hope she doesn't make a wrong turn.

Then tonight when Kevin and I were making up the bed to go to sleep, we found a little prize from the cats. A dead Gecko in the bedspread. Yeah. Dead things in the bed. Just what you want before you go to sleep.